Posted in #blogging, #life, Self love, Strength, Writing

To Love the one…that is you!!

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There are so many moments in our life that make us feel it’s over, like there is nothing beyond this pain and hurt. This darkness takes over and everything seems blank. The feeling of emptiness, a hollowness which can’t be filled and every little thing frustrates to the core. Things which made us happy before hurt us now.
Loneliness! A feeling that there’s no one for us, and we are all alone in this world, left to bear that pain everyday, when we open our eyes and every night lying on the bed, closed eyes, there’s this feeling to end all of this torment right and then.

This feeling!!!!

We all have felt that way, at some point of time in life we all have this feeling. Alone! I felt that. Still feel that, days in a row when I want to just go somewhere, where I don’t get hurt again, where I don’t cry, where I can smile. Moments when I need someone to be with me, we all want that right? To have someone who can just embrace us with our flaws and love our scars and make us whole?
Those moments in which we feel so weak and we are so down, heart full of hurt and mind full of anger and pain.

Why do we feel this?

The root of all the sufferings is attachment. I never realised this until I experienced this in my life, we get attached and then without even knowing we start expecting that same attachment from the other person. Expectation doesn’t hurt, but expecting from the wrong person does. Even a person isn’t wrong or right, when we get attached to someone, we can’t expect from the other person to reciprocate the same.

What I am implying with all of this?

Love the one that is you!!

Although I need to learn this myself, and I am learning this everyday, the cardinal thing in life we all need to learn is to love this one person in our life who is most important, and that is US. We need to learn to love ourself and live for ourself.
To accept that it’s only us who can be there for us and no one else will be. We aren’t alone ever, we always have us, ourself.We don’t need anyone to get dependent on, just faith and believe in ourself.
To learn that we don’t need anyone to make us feel whole because we are never incomplete, we are complete on our own. We don’t need to find happiness in someone else, it’s within us, we just need to explore it and accept that we can be happy on our own as well. Yes, we all feel shattered and broken, but that’s okay, to be broken means we can heal.
To know that, the home we try to find or built in someone else is not to be found because it’s there in you!! Look deep within in your heart. Pull yourself up and smile, because that’s what we need to do. Smile and face the world and accept the truth,
Love isn’t something we need to find in someone else, it’s there within you.
It’s difficult but it’s the only truth!! That someone is always you and no one else!!

@thelostsoul

Image: google

Posted in #blogging, #life, Self love, Strength, Writing

Perfectly Flawed

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“She got that sexy figure”
“Oh her perfect curves”
“Eww! How could be anyone that thin?!”
“She needs to workout on her”
“Oh! How fair she is”
“Will you ever get someone? With this complexion of yours? “

These are few of the random things knowingly or unknowingly, intentionally or unintentionally we speak or hear or use. There’s a thin line between complimenting and commenting and people often forget that.

I have been dealing with inferiority complex issues all my life. And then anxiety due to that, Not feeling happy in my skin. I always had problems with how I look or my complexion or my hair or my weight and somehow it was all connected with the fact that I often heard such expressions around me, for me,and it started to creep in my personality. I always thought I am not good enough.

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I am not here to talk about my problem or my issues or to discuss about body shaming but their were so many thoughts in my mind and I just felt like sharing them here.

Beauty is something over rated in our society from centuries and is mostly connected to the second sex, yes that’s what we were called, females.
And we girls often just give in to this thing which we are taught from the beginning like being a girl we have to look pretty all the time. We just start believing in what is there already  and we are never taught to question it.
I am not denying that males aren’t body shamed but not as much as a female.

Where does the problem lies?

Problem is Us believing.
Our belief  in the things which we are told about and taught. And us not questioning it. Why don’t we question why a girl need to look pretty? Why a girl with curves is sexy? Or why a girl with bigger breasts or large butts is hot? And why a girl with a tummy isn’t pretty? And why a girl with fair complexion is treated as angelic? Or why all of these are just attached with only the females?

The point I am focusing on isn’t that one should not maintain their health and fitness or look pretty, but what I mean is that it should be done but not for others and definitely not on the cost of deteriorating one’s mental health.
Girls start to have inferiority complex issues that create a deep impact on their personality from their teenage years which actually affect their lives till later stage in so many ways.
It creates complication for a girl in the personal front as a girl with such issues will always have a thought in mind Am I good enough? And questioning self worth is the worst thing a person could do to torture oneself.

What I want to focus here on is the fact that being beautiful will not have any importance unless that beauty doesn’t make you feel complete and whole in what and who you are. It won’t matter how thin or how sexy curves you have when to achieve that you lost your happiness and mental health or deprived yourself of the sleep or food that made you happy.
Everyone has flaws and the existence of humanity lies in the fact that we are tend to be flawed and no one has any right to question someone’s appearance in terms of their own set standards.
A Flaw for some may be a beauty for another.
No matter how you look, what colour your skin is or what weight you have or what size until the fact that it makes you smile  and feel comfortable and a satisfaction of you being you and that too whole.

As an individual what we need to learn is to love and accept  the fact that this is what we are and come in terms to whatever we are and embrace that. We all are just flesh and bones. Yes,being healthy is important or having curves or having or doing anything that makes you look good but only  till the point that it makes you feel cheerful  within you and your soul.

As a part of society what everyone need to learn is not to comment or compliment someone in a way that makes them think over it. That makes them question their individuality.

Being myself suffering from these issues have actually made me realise some of these things but trust me path of loving yourself isn’t easy and every day it feels like a defeat but somehow I am managing it and somehow I am moving ahead in it. I am trying to love me more and focusing on what I can do to enhance what I have and learning to love my flaws.
Because every one is flawed and that too uniquely.

Beauty is not in being just that pretty face but it is in the eyes and the smile of the soul which appears on the curves of the lips.

The Lost Soul

Image: Google and Pinterest