Posted in #life, Heart break, Lost love, Love, Unsent letter, Writing

#An Unsent Valentine letter.

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I keep on counting days. Not just days, I haven’t lost count of the moments I am breathing without you. Trust me it’s not easy to have a single breath without missing your words or smile or eyes or voice or all of you. I still remember the day I saw you, waiting for me, my heart skipped a beat. Oh it still beats in that rhythm. The rhyme you gave it. Yes. Still that.
It was Valentine, I thought it to be over soon. It didn’t. I missed you each second. I knew you weren’t. You won’t. Oh but my heart? It was desperately waiting for your text. Just a text. Because you don’t like calling. I waited. Waited. The moment I woke up in the morning with moist eyes, I waited till I cried myself to sleep. I hope you had a good sleep though. Or did you miss me? You probably didn’t. You never did. You never will.
I went to the same place, you took me. A wave like a tsunami hit me. Gushing memories all together like it was yesterday we were here, eyes lost in eyes, synchronising heart beats,knotted hands and hearts, you made me feel dancing butterflies. Deep blue were the skies. A blissful moment, now it was tormenting. Nothing was same. Neither you nor the moment. Except me. Still there. Lost in you. Living in the moment. Still.
I puffed in the air around me like trying to breathe in the scent of you and us from that day. And then I kept on walking my way. That’s what I have to do. Keep walking. I tried to turn and look back, then something in me said, No, don’t, it’s gone. It’s not there. Nothing is there anymore. Not you. Not the love.
I won’t run though, from all that we had. Because I still love you. I will always do. Even after whatever happened, whatever you did. I have something of you with me. Yes, the heartache and the memories.
I will keep loving you and living you,
Until the memories turn white.
Till I loose the sight. Oh dear I still haven’t lost hope. Not of you coming back, but of the believe that I will cope. With you. Your memory.
But till then, I will keep walking. Looking forward, Smiling. Without you. But with the remembrance of us.
Until some new memories aren’t made.
Till the time, I won’t fade.

The Lost Soul.

Image: Google( artfinder.com)

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Posted in #life, #void, Heart break, Lost love, Unsent letter, Writing

Words not said… letter I won’t send..

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It’s past midnight. Sleep is far away from the eyes. There is this saturninity pulling me outside. I left my warm bed to embrace the dark night, filled with the sparkling moonlight,Moon illuminated and shining bright in the sky. It looked calm and serene. Seeing it in the night sky, I missed the night we were together. Remember how you kissed my head? Your hands around my waist bringing me closer, you blissed my lips, left me wanting for more. The moon was shining that night too. Is it the same moon that witnessed our togetherness? Don’t you miss it? Do you?

The air is cold. It’s chilling my bones to the core, Just the way your touch used to. Remember the ecstatic mornings we used to had, when in your arms, you gave me warmth making me forget the world looking into your eyes. Breathing my name on my neck. It was enchanting, you and your desires caressing my heart beats.You don’t miss my voice, do you?

I see the flickering stars. They are so far and still close to moon. Like you are and still enclose to my heart.

Don’t you miss those nights when all
We did was nothing but in each other’s arms cuddled together in the darkness of our room silently kissing each other, writing each other’s names on hearts. This night is dark too. And in the darkness of your heart you won’t ever see my face, the one you loved, will you?

There is this vastness of silence around me. And in this quiescence I hear your voice in my ears calling out to me, the same one that made me weak In my knees. Looking around I know you aren’t here but somewhere else, so far from my presence.

Birds have started to chirp. I see the sphere in different hues with the moistness in my eyes. It’s still night somewhere in my heart. Remember we saw the sun rising from the window while making love and you said this is the second Beautiful thing, I was the first. That still make me blush you know. Snuggling up to me intently, while in your sleep.I still feel that warm touch of your fingertips on my nape.Your sweet whispers in my ears, making me turn my face, looking in your eyes..You in my eyes. Lost. Loosing.Still. I lost and you win, didn’t you?

For me it will always be night. For you were my day and my light.
And seeing this moon, that’s still in the sky I know you see this moon too and we share the same sky and somehow I know my love shines like that moonlight spreading all over you and someday you will know that there is someone still loving you the same like she used to do.She still does. For my love is like this moon and this sky, like the stars. Always shining, burning bright till and beyond infinity.

But I won’t tell you all this, you don’t care. Never did. Never will. Or Do you? Will you if I tell you that I still care? Always did. Always will.

The Lost Soul.

 

Image: Google

Posted in #life, #void, Lost love, Writing

Is it The End?

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This is the letter to you. A letter I won’t send.

And in the end finally you left. Not like I didn’t know it will
Happen but I was running away from it from so long. I was lost in that last song.
I was dreading the moment I will hear those words but who is to blame. All these months you from the other end were holding on the rope weren’t you? Or it was me all this time? Loosing myself in your game.
Why? Is all I can ask. You were my everything and you knew that so well. You still are but I won’t tell you this again. I have lost all my energy now in loving you and your memories. Yes you are my memory. A happy and a sad. Reminiscence of all that was between us safe in my heart forever. I believed in you all this while. But you were not there. The moment you left me was my answer, but I kept on holding that rope for so long. There was a bridge between us. You were on the other end and you weren’t even looking at me while I was trying to cross and I was looking at you but it was all in a haze. I thought you are there
For me to hold my hand and I kept on walking towards you not really knowing that it was broken. I fell. I fell so deep. It hurts. I fell in that maze.
Your last words are in my ears. Your all the words are actually. You are. The whole of you is in me. You are gone from
My life but this mark you have left on my soul won’t leave ever.
Not that I want it to.
I loved you. I still do. With whatever I had. With all of that I still have. And it will be forever.
But I won’t beg you anymore to stay, No.
You are better gone. Yes I am in this abyss right now and you have moved on.
I will climb though, to the other side. I will not keep looking for you anymore.
I am exhausted. And sometimes I can not breathe. You were beats to my heart. You were my oxygen.
You are my only. I don’t want to open the doors of my heart for anyone.
They are closed for now. Or forever.
You will live here in my heart. The wounds you have given me will stay and they will bleed I know, they will bleed never to heal. But that’s okay. I will live and love them.
Like I will live without you. Like,
I will love you without you.

The Lost Soul.

PS: This Lost Soul was actually Lost these days and still is. Somethings happened and I am trying to keep myself alright but it’s hard. But I guess whatever happens happen for a reason right. I am hoping that too.

Posted in #blogging, #Poetry, Object Poetry, Writing

Out of the box.

 

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“Sob”
When they brought me home
I was full
They were happy.
Ah! Tickling small hands
Wanted to unwrap
Those smart ones
Handling with care.

Oh, My blabbering.
I didn’t tell you
Who am I?
It’s pleasure to meet you
Me?
I am a Box.
Yes! The same one
You got your Tv in,
Fridge, machine,
Books and toys.
Of course they all were not me
Duh! But my family
Unçle, brother,
Friends and cousins.

My bad! Why am I talking to you?
Because
I am sad.
I wasn’t till this morning
Within me I was carrying
This beautiful piece
Of artistry
And till the time
I wasn’t in their hands
I was flying
Oh my feet never saw the ground.
Oh then befell
The tragedy
They took me in their hands
Opening me
They took away my love
Far away from me
Leaving me alone
Empty
Tittered
Tattered
Sitting in a corner
No one is looking at me
I am lying
Shattered
And you know what hurts?
That no one bothers.

This is me.
Every time
Most of the time
I make friends and I fall in love
But my story is short lived
Because they separate
Me from my friends
All hell break down.

Oh no!!
Please no!

Bam! Bam!Bam!
Great! now I am homeless too
Oh! It’s cold here
Alone on the street
Lying in the feet
Wailing
Waiting
Every time
Till I get a new love
A new home
Till some one pick me up
Reuniting me with my family
Until someone
Twist me
Kick me
& toss
I will be staying here
All alone
Until someone will see me
With kind eyes
I will be sitting here
Yes, I will be.

That’s me. That’s my story.
I carry stocks,
Blocks to blocks
Needle
Machinery
Flips and flops
Shows and crocs
Paintings and toys
Piece of arts
Some beautiful drawings
But they all are taken
Out of the box
Making me
An Empty Box.

The Lost Soul.

PS: This is my try at object poetry. Hope you give love to this lost box.

Image: Google (Painting by Fine Art America)

Posted in #blogging, Writing

Let’s Be Friends?

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Hello anybody there?
Anyone?
Please!
I am suffocating here
It’s been long you see
Inside here
I can’t move
I can’t breathe
I can’t shift
It’s choking
Hey!
Listen
I am not joking.
I need to go out
To see the world
To hear, to talk
To shout
I screech here
Oh boy!
They don’t hear
Sometimes they do
Though
But then they are scared
And run in thin air
I don’t understand
Why are they frightened
I am just a kid
Isn’t that allowed
To talk
Make friends?
It’s been a long time
I haven’t made any
They left me here
I am waiting and waiting
The clock is
Clicking and clicking
I have no friend
Is this the end?
Ah! Here comes someone
I will make friends with him
I don’t want to be alone
Anymore
It’s been long you see
Almost years twenty five.
Here, lying alone
A child so naïve
I was just five
I had dark eyes
I begged them not too
Oh I didn’t know, I was dead.
Then they
Left
Leaving me here
Under the ground,
In this box
My toy I kept close
To my chest.
They the one I loved
A long time ago,
Buried me here
Deep inside,
Now I will
Take your leave,
For now I have company
But if ever you want to
Talk,
Please be my guest,
Here I lay,
A child
Not so in peace
In the nearest graveyard
I rest.

The Lost Soul.

PS: Hello everyone, here I am with something different again. I don’t know till how much time I could be apart from my love inspiration, haha but Till then I hope you like what I am writing & I am sorry for missing your blogs, I will catch up in few days. Lots of love.

Yours

The Lost Soul.

Posted in #blogging, Writing

Jasper, The Beginning.

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Small boy of five
Frightened
Scared
Hiding In corner
Closed eyes
Hands on ears
Still he hears
Slaps and screams
His father on his mother
Helpless he stares
In blank
Silently crying
Whispering prayers
To end it all.

A boy of ten,
His mother no more
It’s killing him
To be under the same roof
A murderer
His father?
Or a Devil
Penetrating him
And his soul
Weeping
In hushing tone
He prays
Oh lord
How much more?

A boy of fifteen,
His face agleam
Drunkard father
Threw him on the floor
Not crying now
Not anymore
He see her
His mother
He hears those
Her screams
Picking up the smashed glass
Killed the devil
Free was his soul
Blood on his hands
Freedom on his mind
Closing the doors
He ran
He ran
He ran
Till he reached the shore,

Run, Jasper
You have to,
In the darkness
He ran alone.

Waking up
In a shudder
A man,
Holding a gun
Fear in his eyes
Memories still haunts him
But he know
He did rise,
Away from the Shadows
Carrying a rose
With a Gun
He walks
People run
Still sometimes
Afraid of the dark
Still he walks
On a thorny path
He loves that child
On the street
Plays with him
Whenever he meet,
This face of that man
Nobody have seen
That five year old
Is still within
But
Fear now fears him
Yes
For he is now
Jasper, The Black Thorn Klein.

The Lost Soul.

PS: So this is prequel to my earlier poem, Jasper the black thorn Klein, my first fictional character. if you want to read the earlier one you can read it Here

So for a change This Lost Soul, Wrote something that’s not related to love. Haha. Hope you will like this.

Posted in #life, #void, Lost love, Love, Writing

Along The Strand.

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The smile you brought
On my face with One word.
It’s gone. No curve on my lips. Your words, tickling, used to move me within. Now your memories shake me inside out.

That smile of yours, gave me shivers. How could I ever forget those spine chilling touch. It’s all an illusion now. Now that I see you from afar. Happy and living. Why can’t I? Live? It’s so hard to fight my feelings & to strive.
Because I thought you were my life.

You are happy. I wish I could be too. But how could I? Without you. You were and are my first and last wish. To lord I pray everyday, to bring you back. I try each day but I can’t live alone, Now when you are gone,
I am slipping too, my life like sand, wishing you were there to hold my hand.

Visiting the same places we went. I still look out searching for you. Though I know you aren’t here but oceans apart. You went Abandoning me, teary eyed. I am drowning in this abyss. I see the shore, but I won’t go there, I am sure? I want to drown. You were my home and now I have no one to call my own.

Or I want to move with the waves. Touching those shingles and meeting the sea. Again and again, just like our bodies used to Rhyme. I will move too Along the Strand.

Though, leaving a part of me, Always, Some in You, Some in Time.

The Lost Soul.

 

Image: Google (Towards the sun, Livemaster)